Life Is So Hard Sometimes.

I keep going between these two lovely face-warmers, trying to decide which one I'm going to make for my niece for Christmas. On the one hand, the top picture apparently has a set of knit fingers protruding from the forehead, integrated deep-set wrinkles, and could be trying to slowly digest the child underneath.

On the other hand, the bottom picture is just about the most amazing thing I've ever seen, what with the blue lips/nose combo, the yellow yarmulke with attached fringe, and the copious tufts of ear-hair complete with shiny pink bows.

What to do. What to do.

Racial Tolerance in Children is Overrated

I am aware that there are a lot of parents who read Homemade Hilarity; parents of young, innocent, wonderfully malleable precious little snowflakes who have yet to learn of all the wonders and complexities of the human species. They do not yet know, for example, that all Chinese people are indeed a uniform bright canary yellow in color and are immensely pleased to wear rice paddy hats to work everyday down at the math factory. Similarly, these kids may have not yet been made aware that any face can be made to look sufficiently middle-or-far-eastern-like if colored any shade of brown and given vaguely-slanted eyes and an unidentifiable head wrap. Is s/he Sri Lankan? Egyptian? Afghani? Who cares? It's not like any of us need to know the difference anyway.


To teach your children all these valuable life lessons and many more, either you can spend years reiterating personal cultural prejudices in the hopes that they might finally sink in someday, or you can choose to make racial stereotyping fun with this Masks-of-the-World craft kit! Your little angels will be repeating ignorance-based ethnic slurs before you know it!

Also included in this set: red construction paper and a neon-dyed feather selection for the "Majestic Native American" mask, as well an array of sun-burned orange paper and pre-cut moustaches to make your very own "Mexican Fiesta" face! Arriba!

I'm Stumped By You

No, creepy-children's-overalls-stuffed-with-fake-ivy, I'm stumped by you.

'Trailer Trash' Has Taken On A Whole New Meaning

I just found this before/after picture in a Craftster forum, and I believe, at this junction, I can only say 'wow'.

I mean, really, just wow. In fact, wooooow. Not only did this this crafter take a good long look at a used plastic grocery bag and think it was a highly underrated and completely child-safe material with which to wrap a small child, but they then went ahead and publicly posted this pint-sized butcher's apron as if it were an adorable little sun dress. All it's missing is a tin-foil bonnet and newspaper booties and lil' Cinderella here is ready for the ball.
I fear for this tot's future. And possibly her entire summer wardrobe.

Unless, of course, this crafter is actually demonstrating their nifty ability to physically manufacture adorable little baby girls out of used plastic bags. Because that would actually be quite impressive.