Wednesday, 9 September 2009

Fuck Cats, Man.

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So I just made a vow over at URLesque.com to not post anything about cats today. And they've linked to me in return. It seems like a fair trade. In a spiteful, childish, cat-hating kind of way.

But still, it works.

So, in the spirit of today's ban on all things feline, here's not a cat:

And this isn't a cat either:

They're just terribly inappropriate and badly made.

So take that, cats. I don't even need to post about you to have a good time. And what. Fucking cats. Ruining everything. Taking over our websites and intertubes and bases. Being all pompous and shit. Like they're better than us. Licking themselves all luxuriously-like and shit like they taste good. Well, I, for one, have had it with their de-humanizing antics! Down with cats, up with burned-wood hand-engraved crab-shaped toilet-seat lids/mohair-crocheted fake-baby multicolour fuzzy suits!

12 comments:

  1. Is the crab seat supposed to be some sort of warning device ???... ie Sit on here and this is what you'll get by golly ??.... or is the doll an example of what you'll get after you sit on the toilet seat ??? She looks itchy.

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  2. Dude, my cat would so shred that damn baby outfit.

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  3. I'm with you on the F___ the cats thing! And let' not even talk about what those lousy cats are doing to the sand boxes the kids are playing in at the park.

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  4. I'm okay with a cat moratorium, but I don't know if lolcrabs are going to take off. "I can has VD from this toilet seat?"

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  5. hah! Jk! That's what I was saving this for!

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  6. ROFLMLAO (rolling on the floor laughing my lolcat ass off)!! She said as she watched one of her six cats lick itself languidly.

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  7. No, but I'm a cat and this is funnier than hell, lol.

    PussDaddy

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  8. Fucking Cats is the new...
    ALL YOUR BASE ARE BELONG TO US.

    Hasn't Fonzie jumped this shark yet?

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  9. That hand-crafted toilet seat cover wouldn't be of the "scratch-n'sniff" variety, would it?

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  10. your anti-cat rant is kinda turning me on

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  11. The crab seat cover is reminding me of a joke kids told in grade school: Don't throw toothpicks in the toilet because crabs can pole vault.

    I never thought I'd have a use for that old joke again....

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